Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
kristin has been a bad kristin
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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