saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
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