Nicole vs. Life
it wasn't lemon gatorade
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
