glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
