Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
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He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
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im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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