her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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