Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
