never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
