i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize