I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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