How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
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