Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
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