Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
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