She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
then he tried to convert me to islam
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Randomize
