remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
