Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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