oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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