She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
