the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
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