Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Randomize
