can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
