Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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