Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
