Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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