i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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