i can't believe i had my finger in that
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
