i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Randomize