a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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