i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize