Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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