Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
