I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
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