just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
I'm really busy with my period
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