Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize