Buhtt sex?
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Randomize
