I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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