He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
