Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
