He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Randomize