Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
