By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
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