can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
