So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
Randomize
