theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize