we have officially lost it.
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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