So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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