I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
it glows. i had to have it.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
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