Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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