they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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