I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
